Thanks for Coming

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Christmas is so messy.

I’ll let you into a (non)secret: I’m not so good at housework.  Right now I’m supposed to be cleaning, but as you can see, I’m not.  And at Christmas, there’s more stuff around, plus there’s more stuff to do which in this home takes priority over housework.  So our already-not-exactly-neat home is now even more messy.  It’s littered with Christmas crafts, envelopes, scraps of wrapping paper and ribbon, and pine needles.  Yesterday I had several ribbons sellotape to the sole of my slipper for longer than is reasonable before I addressed the issue.

It’s messy in other ways too.  Around about mid October I begin to dread the Christmas fair.  This year it lived up to my dire expectations, once again.  It’s not that I disagree with it in principle, but rather it is too overwhelming for me and my kin.  We cannot cope with it at all.  This year, only half of my children cried throughout.  I left in such a hurry that when I realised we had one toddler welly missing, I refused to go back in.  “I’ll buy new wellies if I have to!” said I.

Here is a text I sent a friend the week before the Christmas fair:

“This week we had to bring in a cup of sweets each on Monday, email the school some photos of us doing some ‘extreme reading’ (but safely), bring in some bread from our culture tomorrow and a gift for the school fair, wearing our own clothes, on Friday… I’m always aware it would be less mad if I only had 1 or 2 children at school, so it’s not really the school’s fault.  Plus it’s fun.  Although the other parents seem confused too.  ‘This time do we wrap it? Do they wear spots? Have I missed the shoe box deadline?’ (yes)…”

I will inevitably drop several balls in December.  Last week I was supposed to watch my daughter’s gymnastics assessment, but I forgot.  She was very gracious about it, but it didn’t feel good.  I wonder what I’ll forget to do this week.  Hopefully nothing life-threatening or childhood-scarring.  And my poor husband is bombarded with crazy text messages as I try to get him to help me to remember everything.

However, the biggest mess I see at Christmas, as I experience this pressure-cooker of festivity and reflect on the year gone by, is in my own heart.  I’m still selfish, I’m still trying to be self-sufficient, I’m still self-centred.  God is changing me, by his grace.  But folks, progress is slow.

And yet, God himself came down to meet me in this mess.

The tragedy of carol services is how overfamiliar we become with the awesome words of Scripture.  I mean, just look at this:

20 But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, ‘Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. 21 She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus,[f] because he will save his people from their sins.’

22 All this took place to fulfil what the Lord had said through the prophet: 23 ‘The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel’[g](which means ‘God with us’). (Matthew 1)

He came down to save us from our sins.  To deal with our mess.  He came to be with us.  I don’t deserve that, but oh how I need it.

Thank you, thank you, thank you Jesus.  Thank you for coming.

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Dear Santa

I’m just kidding, I don’t write to Santa.  That’s because he’s a big fat lie who drinks sherry.

At this time of year everyone asks what you want for Christmas, and for some that’s lovely and for others it’s really stressful.  If you’re in the latter group, here are some ideas from me:

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In no particular order:

  1. None Like Him  – this is a book about God, with short chapters and big truths, explained brilliantly by Jen Wilkin.  She is really good at writing, and I don’t say that about many people.  She has a gift and she’s using it to teach us how we are not like God, and that’s a good thing!  I highly recommend this – get your best friend a copy too and read it together.
  2. Prayer – Timothy Keller.  The book absolutely blew my mind.  The only trouble with it was that I wanted to read it about five times, but it took me a year to read (on and off) so there wasn’t much chance of that.  You know I love Tim Keller – he’s fantastic.  What a blessing he is to so many people.  This book will inspire you to pray and then give you practical advice for daily prayer.  Here’s some inspiration from the book about how the Lord Jesus sets us an example:
    Jesus Christ taught his disciples to pray, healed people with prayers, denounced the corruption of the temple worship (which, he said, should be a “house of prayer”), and insisted that some demons could be cast out only through prayer.  He prayed often and regularly with fervant cries and tears (Heb 5:7), and sometimes all night.  The Holy Spirit came upon him and anointed him as he was praying (Luke 3:21-22), and he was transfigured with the divine glory as he prayed (Luke 9:29).  When he faced his greatest crisis, he did so with prayer.  We hear him praying for his disciples and the church on the night before he died (John 17:1-26) and then petitioning God in agony in the Garden of Gethsemane.  Finally, he died praying. 
  3. The Plausibility Problem – Ed Shaw.  This book isn’t hot off the press (none of these books are), but I think this should be compulsory reading for any Christian who’s serious about obeying Jesus’ command to love one another.  However, it’s not my job to set compulsory reading for Christians, so I’ll jus say it comes very highly recommended.  It’s not just a book about loving people who are same-sex attracted*, it’s about how to love people and live as church family, as we’re called to do.  It’s fascinating, it’s challenging, it’s very moving.  Thank you, Ed.
  4. Gilead – Marilynne Robinson.  Oh my goodness, I read this a couple of months ago and it’s a book I didn’t want to finish.  It won the Pulitzer Prize in 2005, which yes means I am very, very behind on life.  It’s the memoire of a mid-twentieth Century pastor in rural Iowa, and if you like good writing and a good character piece, and especially (but not necessarily) if you’re a Christian, you’ll love this.  She’s written other books too, which I should probably read…
  5. Pilgrim’s Progress – John Bunyan.  Right, so I’ll come clean.  I haven’t actually read Pilgrim’s Progress.  If you think that’s bad, then wait till I tell you that I think it was required reading for my English degree.  It’s not on my Christmas list because I know exactly where it is on my bookshelf.  You know when you’re in a Bible study and someone says, “This reminds me of Pilgrim’s Progress when..” and then gives a really poignant and relevant example?  And you have to smile and nod because you’ve never read it?  Well I plan, by the end of 2018, to be able to smile and nod sincerely, because I will have read it.  Hey, I might even be the one with the insightful Bunyan anecdote.  Maybe we could read it together – so to speak – next year?

If you’d like other ideas, click on the “Books” category and you should see my previous posts about books I recommend.

 

*This is how Ed Shaw describes himself.  It’s all explained in the book!

One True Christmas Gift

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Christmas is round the corner and we all know what that means.  There is a stereotype of a busy mum at Christmas, and I don’t know about you but I find that I am that stereotype.  I love Christmas – did I mention that? – but let’s face it, it’s a crazy time.  It’s a time when I make crazy decisions and I overreach to new and surprising heights.

Advent is a time when we feel pulled in several directions all at once.  There are children’s parties and grown-up parties (which non-parents just call parties), church outreach events, church social events, Christmas shopping, over-excited children, gift wrapping, travel, relatives, Christmas cards, sometimes Birthdays (e.g. mine), Secret Santas, school performances, more baking than usual and (we hope not but maybe) the occasional bout of flu.

So at this busy time, when we can become so much like Martha of Bethany, rushing around in a sweat and scowling because nobody is helping, it’s all-the-more important that we try to be like Mary, who sat at the feet of Jesus and listened to him – I assume it’s not just me.

There are many resources around to help us meditate on the Lord Jesus during the Christmas period, and I wanted to recommend this one to you – One True Gift – as it’s new and it’s a little bit different.  Sometimes a different angle can help us to refocus.

It’s by Tim Chester, who I think is brilliant.  If you haven’t read Total Church, which is now really old, then please do.  You don’t have time now, but maybe in January.  I really enjoyed reading his Advent devotion in John’s gospel, One True Light a couple of years ago.  He’s a good man and he communicates the gospel in a down-to-earth way, which is very helpful when you’re knee-deep in overambitious Christmas crafts.

The thing that makes this book a bit surprising is that it’s a 24-day meditation on Philippians 2, which isn’t usually seen as a festive passage of Scripture.  But since it’s about the Son of God coming to earth as a human baby, who would grow up to serve and even to die, and is therefore now raised up to the highest place from which he’ll return one day to judge the world, there are plenty of good reasons to meditate on this passage in the run up to the celebration of the astonishing and marvellous incarnation.

So while I’m doing my worst Martha impression in the run up to Christmas, here are three ways in which, by God’s grace, I expect this book will help me:

I’ll be rebuked by Jesus the servant:
“‘I’m willing to serve,’ we might say, ‘but not that person – not after the way they’ve treated me.’ Yet Jesus washes the feet of Judas knowing that Judas already has 30 pieces of silver jangling in his wallet.” (p. 47)
Jesus is my example to learn from and to follow.

I’ll be encouraged by the love of Jesus.
“Jesus died for your sins.  When he hears you grumbling and arguing, he didn’t turn away in disgust.  In his love he turned towards the cross, arms opened wide to take the nails.  And now in his love he turns towards you, arms opened wide to embrace you.” p. 77.
Jesus is my Saviour to love and to trust.

I’ll be awestruck by the incarnation:
“we are left with this conclusion: the baby in the manger is none other than the LORD, the covenant God of Israel, the Creator, the one, true God.” (p. 41)
Jesus is my Lord to praise and to worship. 

If you don’t buy this book, I do hope you’ll find another way to make sure you’re feeding on God’s word each day this advent, so that your acts of service and good works are done for Him, our Saviour and Lord and the true star of every show.  This book is very accessible, so I’d recommend giving it as an early Christmas gift to a friend or your mum, or anyone you think might be willing to take a closer look at Jesus this Christmas.  You can buy it here from the Good Book Company.

If only they’d checked!

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I really enjoyed this Christmas bite from the splendiferous Martin (he ain’t heavy) Ayers.  Perhaps you can spare 7 mins to have a listen too.  (I think it must have followed a little drama sketch, but you should be able to follow it without much trouble!)

Whether you’re an “Amos” or a “shepherd”, I hope you make the most of your Christmas xx

Hand-in-Hand to Bethlehem

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I love Christmas, me. I love Chris Rea, Wizzard, Paul and Yoko and the Pogues. I love carols. I love mince pies, mulled wine, and sausage stuffing.   I love buying presents for my family and friends. I love having something to be excited about. I am like Scrooge, the way he turned out in the end. (I love A Christmas Carol.)

Christmas certainly means different things to different people. This week I was reading about the trend of buying just four presents for your child: one thing they want; one thing they need; one thing to wear; one thing to read. I also read a lot of opinions about this idea, which I found quite enlightening. I turns out that the idea of only buying four gifts for your child is pretty scandalous. I suppose that shouldn’t surprise me, as Christmas for many people is focused on their children. When I had my first child, someone said to me that I’d enjoy Christmas much more now because it’s more magical with children around. I kind of know what he meant, but to be honest I don’t think my brother and I ever lost the magic of Christmas. We behave like children as soon as we cross the threshold of our parents’ home anyway.

It’s true, is it not, that much of Christmas involves watching your children. Watching them in the school play; watching them opening their presents; watching them sit on Santa’s knee; watching them ride their new bike. And I’m not judging that, but I think there must be more to Christmas than that. I feel that if our Christmas joy is wrapped up in our children, disappointments may abound. What if they are playing the innkeeper’s silent dog again? What if they have a trantrum abut their presents? What if they cry on Satna’s knee? What if they fall of their bike and end up in A&E? And, perhaps worst of all, what if they know that our Christmas joy depends on their contentment? That’s a lot of pressure.

I think we can have a more joyful perspective. My pastor says that in marriage, rather than spending our lives staring into each other’s eyes, we should be walking hand-in-hand towards the throne of God. Or as Tim Keller puts it, we say “I want to partner with you and God in the journey you are taking to his throne. And when we get there, I will look at your magnificence and say, ‘I always knew you could be like this. I got glimpses of it on earth, but now look at you!” (from The Meaning of Marriage.)

I know that parenting is not marriage. They are different. However, if we are walking hand in hand towards the throne and taking our children with us, how much more exciting that will be than if we are just gathered around our children, focusing on them. And how liberating it will be for us and them if we know that Jesus is the one who makes Christmas wonderful.

If the Nativity play serves as a reminder that God’s Son came to live amongst us, then nobody will mind which part they play. (My children’s school play isn’t anything to do with Jesus this year, but thankfully they’ll be in a couple of other nativities.) If the gifts are there to remind us of God’s amazing gift of his perfect Son, then we’ll be more than happy with one or two (or three or even four!). If we’re celebrating the birth of Jesus and all that means for us as God’s people, we won’t have time to queue up for Santa’s grotto anyway.   And as for the trip to A&E, that will be something of a disappointment. But that’s OK, because we’re looking ahead to a perfect world, made open to us by the coming of our Saviour.

It’s so easy at Christmas to get our heads down and forget the bigger picture. To get stressed about the shopping or the cooking or the costume-sourcing. But I’m going to try to lift my eyes to Jesus, to his scandalous incarnation, to God’s glory, to good news of great joy, and I’m hoping that my children will follow my gaze and look up at him with me.

The Christmas Alphabet

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I know it’s very much still Autumnal November, but I’m just planning ahead.

I’ve got an idea for a Christmas card craft, and in order to do it I needed a Christmas Alphabet.  I could have just Googled this, but I wanted to make it up myself (no-one knows why).  Speaking of Alphabets, I highly recommend you listen to the Bible Alphabet song from Emu’s J is for Jesus CD.  (“H is for heaven, where I-I am going,” need I-I say more?)

I don’t know if this could be helpful to you in any way?  Perhaps you could do one a day during advent?  I know that the alphabet is 26 letters long, not 24, but some of them could be squashed together.  For example, you’ll notice that Q is a bit, well, not quite tenuous but perhaps uninspiring.   Sometimes I was spoilt for choice, so I put a few ideas down and have underlined the one I’ve used here.

You might also notice that there is a lot of repetition, which (aside from maybe being inevitable) was deliberate.  Children like repetition, and it helps them learn.  I was actually amazed by how much you can get out of Luke Chapter 2 alone.  I mostly used Isaiah 9; Matthew 1-2; Luke 2; John 1.

So without further ado, here you go – an early Christmas present from me (no expense spared):

Angels:  But the angel said to them, ‘Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. Luke 2:10

Bethlehem: But you, Bethlehem Ephrathah, though you are small among the clans of Judah, out of you will come for me one who will be ruler over Israel, whose origins are from of old, from ancient times.’ Micah 5:2

Christ: Today in the town of David a Saviour has been born to you; he is Christ, the Lord. Luke 2.11

David’s Town: Today in the town of David a Saviour has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. Luke 2:11 (See also: Does not Scripture say that the Messiah will come from David’s descendants and from Bethlehem, the town where David lived?’ Luke 7:42; “He will reign on David’s throne’ Isaiah 9:7)

Everlasting Father: “For to us a child is born… And he will be called Wonderful Counsellor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” Isaiah 9:6

Favour: Glory to God in the highest heaven, and on earth peace to those on whom his favour rests.’ Luke 2:14

Glory/Grace/Gold/Gift/Good news/Grace: We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth. John 1:14

Holy/Heavenly Host/Hope: Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying,
‘Glory to God in the highest heaven,
and on earth peace to those on whom his favour rests.’ Luke 2:13-14

Immanuel:  All this took place to fulfil what the Lord had said through the prophet: ‘The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel’ (which means ‘God with us’). Matthew 1:22-23

Joy/Jesus: But the angel said to them, ‘Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. Luke 2:10

King: ‘Where is the one who has been born king of the Jews? We saw his star when it rose and have come to worship him.’ Matthew 2:2

Love/Life/Light:
The people walking in darkness
have seen a great light;
on those living in the land of deep darkness
a light has dawned. Isaiah 9:2

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Messiah/Manger This is how the birth of Jesus the Messiah came about: his mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be pregnant through the Holy Spirit. Matthew 1:18

Noel/Nativity/News: But the angel said to them, ‘Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. Luke 2:10

One & Only Son: We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth. John 1:14

Prince of Peace:  For to us a child is born… And he will be called
Wonderful Counsellor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” Isaiah 9:6

Quiet/Quirinius: This was the first census that took place while[a] Quirinius was governor of Syria.)  And everyone went to their own town to register. Luke 2:2-3 (You could talk about the sovereignty of God, and the fact that these events happened in real history.) If you’re not keen on this, you could do “Quiet” and talk about how quietly God’s rescuing King came.

Rejoice/Revelation/Righteousness/Reigns The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen, which were just as they had been told. Luke 2:20 (also “When they saw the star, they were overjoyed” Matthew 2:10)
(or Revelation: No one has ever seen God, but the one and only Son, who is himself God and[b] is in the closest relationship with the Father, has made him known. John 1:18)

Saviour:  Today in the town of David a Saviour has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. Luke 2.11

Truth: The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth. John 1:14

Unto Us a child is born “Unto to us a child is born,
to us a son is given…” Isaiah 9:6

Virgin: All this took place to fulfil what the Lord had said through the prophet: ‘The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel’ (which means ‘God with us’). Matthew 1:22-23

Wonderful/Worship: When they saw the star, they were overjoyed. On coming to the house, they saw the child with his mother Mary, and they bowed down and worshipped him. Then they opened their treasures and presented him with gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh. (Matthew 2:10-11)

X: Gloria in Excelsis Deo:
‘Glory to God in the highest heaven,
and on earth peace to those on whom his favour rests.’ Luke 2:14

Yahweh: In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. John 1:1

Zeal: Of the greatness of his government and peace there will be no end…
The zeal of the Lord Almighty will accomplish this. Isaiah 9:7

As ever, your comments are really welcome.  Plus, if you think this is helpful please do share it with others. Happy Autumn everybody!

Good News (finally)!

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By the time you read this I’ll be in sunny Mexico!

Of course that’s not true, I’m not going to Mexico for Christmas.  I’m going to my mum and dad’s, up North, which I love. And one thing you can be sure of at my mum’s – especially at Christmas – is that wherever you’re sitting, there’ll be a newspaper supplement within arm’s reach.

But as I sit down by the fire to look at “2015 in Pictures” it’s not going to fill me with a warm fuzzy glow of contentment, is it? In 2015 the news has been dominated by terrorism, refugees fleeing for their lives, the earthquakes in Nepal back in April, shootings in the United States, and corruption in FIFA. You can easily start to wonder, is there any hope for our world today? Sometimes we just need to hear some good news, don’t we?

Well let’s look at the most terrifying birth announcement in history, from Luke’s gospel (you can read the full passage here):

There were shepherds living out in the fields nearby. It was night, and they were taking care of their sheep. An angel of the Lord appeared to them. And the glory of the Lord shone around them. They were terrified. 10 But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid. I bring you good news. It will bring great joy for all the people. 11 Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you. He is the Messiah, the Lord. (From Luke 2)

We don’t know much about these shepherds, but they were doing a hard job that isolated them from the rest of the community.  They were Jews living in Roman-occupied Judea in Israel. They were poor, and they would have had to pay high taxes to the Romans. Life was tough.

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We’ve heard about the shepherds and the angels so many times that it doesn’t surprise us anymore, but really it is shocking that an angel visited these poor men, working a nightshift outside a small, insignificant town.

I saw the Queen the other day. It was one of the most exciting things that’s happened to me in a long time! I was walking past a church, and she was getting out of a car and walking into the church. I saw her for about five and she didn’t even wave.

But if she’d stopped and turned round, come over to me and said, ‘Can we talk? I have some important news for you, Catherine,’ that would have been astonishing! Because why would the Queen of our nation and the commonwealth want to speak to me, lowly northern housewife that I am?   And if we think that’s ridiculous, then how much more amazing is it that the God of the universe sent his angels to visit these ordinary shepherds?

And what did the angel say? ‘I bring you good news.’ They needed some good news. And don’t we, too?

And do you notice, the angel doesn’t say ‘I bring you a new religion, or I’ve brought you a new set of rules to follow.’ This baby is good news for all of us. This is what makes Jesus’ message so different from all other religions and all other lifestyle choices. It’s not advice or rules or a moral code to follow.   It’s joyful, life-changing news.*

So what’s this news about?

Today in the town of David a Saviour has been born to you. He is the Messiah, the Lord.

Messiah  means ‘anointed one’, or king. It’s the same word as Christ. These Jewish shepherds, if they knew their Jewish scriptures, would have known that God had promised to send a rescuing king to save them.

But what did they need saving from? We get the answer in Matthew Chapter 1, where an angel tells Joseph, Mary’s husband-to-be, that this baby will ‘save his people from their sins.’

It’s not really normal to talk about sins anymore, unless it’s something to do with eating a curly wurly when you’re doing slimming world. I remember Kayleigh in Peter Kay’s Car Share talking about saving up all her syns for the weekend.

But in the Bible sin isn’t something to joke about. It’s the reason we’re not in the relationship with God that we were all made for. My kids have learnt at church that Sin (SIN) stands for Shove off God, I’m in charge, No to your rules. We want to be in charge of our lives, and so we don’t want God telling us what to do. And that means we’re not right with God, and it’s what makes relationships with each other so hard, too.

We might see this most clearly in children, just because they don’t cover it up as well as adults. ‘No!’ ‘Don’t want to!’ ‘Won’t!’ They lie on the floor kicking and screaming because they can’t have their own way. But I do wonder, am I any different, deep down?

The Bible says that this is not just what petulant tots do, it’s the way we all act towards God: we’ve all decided to be in charge of our own lives and so we’ve cut ourselves off from God. That’s why a new set of rules to follow isn’t going to help us, we need a saviour.

I don’t know if you read the story back in May about Pemba Tamang, a 15-year-old Nepalese boy who became trapped under the rubble of a 7-storey hotel during the Kathmandu earthquake. Amazingly he survived for five until a rescue team appeared and dug him out.

Now imagine that instead of clearing a path and carrying him out on a stretcher, the team had just shouted down instructions to him, or sent him a little map of how to crawl out. Of course that wouldn’t work, would it? He was completely trapped, absolutely helpless. He didn’t need instructions, he needed rescuing.

The Bible says that our sin has trapped us, so that we’re cut off from God with no way of helping ourselves out. That’s why a new moral code or a new religion isn’t going to help us. That’s why we need a saviour. And that’s why Jesus is good news for all of us. Jesus came for everyone, because we’re all like Pemba Tamang, trapped under the rubble and debris of our own sin. We all need this Saviour.

Think about it, do I believe that I’m a sinner? Maybe not, most of us don’t think of ourselves as sinners do we? But put it this way: do I live as though I think that I can get on with my life without God in charge of me? Because God sees that as sin, and a serious problem, which cost him everything to fix. He sent his son to earth as a fragile baby so that we could be brought back into that relationship with God that we were made for.

Some news you read or hear about and it just doesn’t apply to you. It might be interesting or even shocking, but unless it’s something to do with the country where you live, or likely to affect you personally, you can usually just carry on as if it’s not really happening.

And I think one way to respond to the message about Jesus is like that, to think ‘well this just doesn’t apply to me.’ But this news isn’t like that. The angels say it’s for all the people. So that does include us. Because God’s view is that everyone needs this Saviour.

Or another way you might respond is to think that you just don’t believe any of this stuff happened. Angels? Saviours?  None of it sounds real. And if that’s how you feel, maybe you could try doing what the shepherds did: “Let’s go to Bethlehem. Let’s see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about.” Maybe, this Christmas, you could go and see for yourself. Read one of the four gospels (Matthew/Mark/Luke/John), or ask a Christian friend to read the Bible with you.  I’d love you to you know how fantastic this news really is, so let me know (e.g. in the comments) if you’d like to and you’re not sure how, or check out the links below:

Some good questions are answered well here, such as ‘can we trust the bible?’
Or there is this short video explaining the Christian message.
Here’s a festive video from my friend Rachel: Make the Most of Christmas

*this is paraphrased from Timothy Keller, King’s Cross.

This blog post is adapted from a talk I did this week at a Christmas event.  Sorry it’s long, but the talk was twice as long! Hope you made it to the end.

As usual, please comment by clicking on the speech bubble at the top.